Shut up, Heather:My Thoughts on Heathers: The Musical

 Greetings and salutations, everyone. Back in September, I did a post like this on Mean Girls: The Musical [which is my favorite musical of all time. I'd really appreciate if you read it, if you haven't already], so I decided it was high time I do a post like this on my second favorite musical. Without further ado, let's get into it.

''Beautiful''

-We open with Barrett Wilbert Weed singing. That's always a good sign.

-''We were so tiny, happy and shiny. Playing tag and getting chased.''

-Man, her voice is freakin' gorgeous. 

-''Welcome to my school. This ain't no high school. This is the Thunderdome.''

-''But I know, I know, life can be beautiful. I pray, I pray for a better way.''

-''We can be beautiful.....just not today.''

-Ooh, I love how this song is introducing all of the characters. It really helps if you haven't seen the movie.

-It's, like, less than a song in, and Veronica's already my favorite.

-Aw, I love Martha. She's so sweet, and she has great taste in movies [The Princess Bride is fantastic.]

-''He is the smartest guy on the football team, which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf.''

-''Whyyyyyyyyyyyy?''

-Ooh, nice, we're introducing the Heathers now.

-So, we have Heather McNamara, the nice-ish cheerleader, Heather Duke, who has no discernable personality, and Heather Chandler, the queen.

-Have I mentioned how much I love this song? 

-I love how all the kids are talking about wanting the Heathers to be nicer, and this one guy's just like, ''I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse, and leave her tied up for the rats.''

-''Grow up, Heather. Bulimia's so '87.'' Cruel, but iconic.

-I love how the musical goes into how Veronica became a Heather. 

-''If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves. That's very important.''

-Jessica Keenan Wynn's singing now. I love her so much. She's fantastic. 

-Okay, doesn't anybody know who Veronica is?

-''Ask me how it feels, looking like hell on wheels. My God, it's beautiful. I might be beautiful. And when you're beautiful it's a beautiful frickin' day.'' That's my favorite part of the song.

-OH MY GOSH, THE ENDING.

I adore this song. It's one of my very favorites.

''Candy Store''

-Can we take a second to appreciate the background music? It's amazing.

-This song is such a bop.

-''I like killer clothes, kickin' nerds in the nose.''

-Their voices just blend so well together! You can hear Jessica the most, but Alice Lee and Elle McLemore sing some amazing parts.

-'''Course if you don't care, fine, go braid her hair. Maybe Sesame Street is on.''

-''You can fly with eagles, or if you prefer, keep on testing me, and end up like her.''

-''Color me stoked.''

-''Honey, whatchu waiting fo-''

-''SHUT UP, HEATHER!''

-''It's my candy stooooooooreee!''

Gosh, that ending. This song is the best.

''Fight For Me''

-The beginning is so chaotic. I love it.

-How come Barrett Wilbert Weed can make swear words sound so beautiful?

-''And, hey, could you face the crowd. Could you be seen with me and still be proud?''

''Hey, could you hold my hand, and could you carry me through No-Man's-Land?''

''And I know CPR.''

-I love how she just calls J.D. Mr. No-Name-Kid.

-''Wanna fight for me? If you're still alive.''

-Man, I love this song. It's making me so emotional. I want to sing this song to my future love interest.

-I love how they're singing swear words in that high-pitched choir way.

-''I would fight for you if you would fight for me.''

''Freeze Your Brain''

-Finally we get a J.D. song

-Okay, this is a whole song about slushies. How awesome.

-Okay, this song is sad but also hilarious.

-''Freeze your braiiiinnnnnnnn!''

-''Who needs cocaine? Freeze your brain.''

-I know Veronica has one line, but it's great.

-Also, her name is just so fun to say, and it sounds great when Ryan McCartan says it [or sings it, to be more accurate].

-''Fight your pain with more pain.''

-You can kind of tell that J.D's not really right in the head in this song.

''Big Fun''

-''Dad says act our age. You heard the man, it's time to rage!''

-This was the first Heathers song I ever heard, so it's special.

-''The folks are gone. It's time for big fun!''

-''Okay, okay, okay, so it's salt and then lime and then shot.''

-''You're doing it wrong!''

-''Dreams are coming true when people laugh but not at you.''

I feel your pain, Veronica. I feel your pain.

-''Big fun! Big fun! Big fun!''

-Ooh, I love Heather Duke's part, even though I prefer her in the movie.

-''I didn't need your help.'' Uh, you kinda did. 

-''Shut up, Heather!''

-''Sorry, Heather!''

-I hope they don't do anything bad to Martha. I like her.

-''Showing up here took some guts. Time to rip 'em out.''

-''There's no alcohol in here. Are you trying to poison me?''

-''Dang-dang-diggity-dang-a-dang, dang-dang-diggity-dang-a-dang.'' Best part of the song.

''Dead Girl Walking

-Ooh, I love the opening. 

-''The demon queen of high school has decreed it. She says Monday, 8 a.m., I will be deleted.''

-''I don't have to stay and die like cattle. I could change my name and ride up to Seattle.''

-I love the lyrics in this musical. They're very clever.

-''Spend these thirty hours getting freeeakkkkyyy!''

-So, it's a song where Drunk Veronica breaks into J.D's house, and sings about sex, and it is quite possibly my favorite song on the soundtrack. Don't judge.

-J.D just sounds so confused in this song. I mean, I probably would be too if I was in his place.

-''Heather says I've gots to go.''

-''And, y'know, y'know, y'know, it's 'cause you're beautiful.''

-Gosh, her voice is so beautiful. She has an incredibly range.

-I feel like this would be a good song to sing with someone in public while trying to make someone else uncomfortable.

-''No more talking, love this dead girl walking.''

-THE ENDING, OH MY GOSH. THEIR VOICES, JUST AHHHH!

''The Me Inside of Me''

-A song about writing a fake suicide note, nice.

--I hid behind smiles and crazy hot clothes.''

-''No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings. No one gets her insecurity.''

-''Jesus, you're making me sound like Air Supply.''

-Ooh, I love Jessica's voice. She makes such a good Heather Chandler [and she's so pretty. Not relevant, but it needed to be said].

-''My looks were just like prison scars. They've left me a myriad of scars.''

-''Myriad, nice.''

-Jessica and Barrett singing together is just the most perfect thing ever. *heart eyes*

-I love how some of the dialogue in this song is the same as in the movie.

-This song gets stuck in my head so much so I'm kinda nervous listening to it.''

-Man, am I just emotional today? 'Cause this song is making me emotional, too. AND IT'S NOT EVEN THAT SAD.

-Is it just me or does Barrett Wilbert Weed sound kind of like Claudia from Warehouse 13 when she talks?

-''Uh, maybe Heather realized that in order to be happy, she had to give up her power. And the only way to do that was death.''

-''Heather touching me.''

-''I'm bigger than John Lennon!''

-''Heather sees the me inside of me.''

''Blue''

-I do like the background music.

-Oh, this is a Kurt and Ram song, so it's kinda creepy and gross and inappropriate.

-I love Duke and McNamara's harmonizing.

-Aw, I feel kinda bad for Veronica.

-Okay, dudes, Veronica was pretty even when she was nerdy.

-Love the Star Wars reference.

-I.....was not a big fan of this song. Of course I'm just not a Kurt and Ram fan, so what did I expect? I mean, yeah, you're not supposed to like them, but they just bother me. 

''Our Love is God''

-The beginning part is sweet if you ignore the murder.

-''You are the only thing that's right about this broken world.''

-No, J.D, don't say it's okay for Veronica to cry.

-Aw, I love when they're harmonizing. 

-''Our Love is God.''

-''Lucky guess?''

-Oooh, I love Veronica's sexy voice.

-''We're what killed the dinosaurs.'' Was that a Heathers movie reference?

-Can I, like, sing the sweet parts to a potential love interest? 

-''Ich luge what?''

-''So let's go hunt some jocks.''

-I love how much of this dialogue is from the movie.

-''You're just unconscious, right? Ram? Ram?''

-I know I said I don't like Kurt and Ram----and I don't, but I they didn't deserve to die 

-Now it's all dark and chaotic. 

-J.D. is freakin' creepy.

-Veronica, see, this is when you should know that he's a very, very bad guy. BREAK UP WITH HIM, ALREADY.

''My Dead Gay Son''

-The fact that this is a song amazes me.

-Aw, I love how Ram's dad is standing up for him. Sure, he's dead, and he wasn't really gay, but still, it's nice.

-I don't know whether to laugh or cry at this song.

-I kinda feel that way about the whole soundtrack

-''I love my dead gay son.''

-I mean, at least they cared about their kids, right? 

-I have mixed feelings about this song.

-Ooohhhh, plot twist. 

''Seventeen''

-''Fine, we're damaged. Really damaged.''

-''Don't you want a life with meeeeee?'' Yes.

-Man, her voice is gorgeous.

-I'd love to sing this song. Idk if my voice is right for it, though.

-''Don't stop looking in my eyes.''

-''Can't we be seventeen? Is that so hard to do?''

-Third Heathers song that's nearly made me cry. 

-''Toniiiiiiiiiiggggghhhhhttttt!''

-''Yeah, we're damaged. badly damaged.''

-This song is EVERYTHING. I love it.

-J.D. choose her. She loves you.

''Shine a Light''

-Everybody gets a solo. Even Ms. Fleming. 

-I kinda like her better in the musical.

-''Shine, shine, shine a light.''

-''Shine, shine, shine''

-This song is always stuck in my head.

-It's a fun song to head-bop to

-''In the sixties love was free.....that did not work out well for me.''

-''1, 2, take me home, kids!''

-Can we take a minute to appreciate Michelle Duffy? Thank you.

-''Shine a light, yeah!''

''Lifeboat''

-Ooh, yay, now it's Mac's song.

-It's a sad one. Man, is this the song that will actually make me cry?

-I love her voice.

-Elle McLemore is an ICON.

-''Everyone's pushing, everyone's fighting.''

-''They'll throw me right over the siiiiiideee.''

-''Well, who made her captain?''

-I feel so bad for Mac in the movie and musical, but especially in the musical.

-This song needed to be longer. I wanted to hear more of her singing.

''Shine a Light [Reprise]''

-''Stupid childproof caps!''

-The music is kinda scary.

-''Whine, whine, whine all night.''

-Heather Duke has such a great voice, but she's so cruel.

-I love the lyrics.

''Whine, whine, whine, like there's no Santa Claus.''

''Die alone, die alone, die alone.''

-This song was way too short #giveheatherdukeherownsong. I mean, in the West End production of Heathers, she does get her own song, but she needed one here.

''Kindergarten Boyfriend''

-Yay, a Martha song.

-I love her voice. Katie Ladner is so talented.

-''There was a boy I met in kindergarden.''

-Who?

-Martha deserves a decent love interest.

-But she is pretty. So pretty.

-I'm guessing this guy that she's talking about is Ram. Maybe?

-''So we sailed above the gym.''

-''My kindergarten boyfriend and I and a horse with wings.''

-I feel so bad for her. She's the only innocent character.

-''Certain girls are meant to be alone.'' No, Martha. No way. You deserve the best.

-How have I never heard this song before?

-The ending is the most emotional thing ever.

''Yo Girl''

-Ooh, creepy music.

-Man, Heather Duke is such a jerk. 

-''Martha, I'm so sorry.'' You can really hear the emotion in Barrett's voice.

-Yeah, this song is dark.

-''Still, you've earned that red scrunchie.''

-''No, you wouldn't understand.''

-''Try me!''

-Uh, Veronica's mom, did you date a creepy psycho who killed your sort-of friend as well as two other guys? No? Then you really wouldn't understand.

-''He's got your handwriting down cold.''

-'' Veronica's running on, running on fumes now. Veronica's totally fried.''

-''Too late. He got in.''

-This song is super chaotic, and I love it

-''Knock knock.''

''Meant to Be Yours''

-J.D's totally insane. 

-''And so I built a bomb.''

-Can we appreciate how much of a good job Ryan does of playing a creep? I mean, I know him from Disney Channel, so I thought I'd have trouble seeing him as creepy, but he's so good at it.

-''We, the students of Westerburg High, will die.''

-Yet another dark, intense song.

-Ooh, the music's really good.

-Seriously, J.D, leave her alone.

-''Veronica, open the door.'' No, Veronica, don't open the door.

-''You were all I could trust. I can't do this alone.''

''Dead Girl Walking [Reprise]

-Yay, a reprise of one of my favorites. 

-''His solution is a lie. No one here deserves to die. Except for me and the monster I created.''

-Barrett's voice is incredible. I know you're all sick of this by now, but she's my Broadway crush [or, uh, one of them, anyway] so let me ramble a little, okay?

-''Heads up, J.D, I'm a dead girl walking.''

-I love Veronica's super calm, ''Yeah,'' when Ms. Flemming said that J.D had told her she'd committed suicide.

-Man, J.D.'s creepy.

-He also uses the word society a lot.

-''I wish your mom had been a little stronger. I wish she'd stayed around a little longer.''

-''I wish you'd come with me.''

-''I wish I had more TNT.''

''Westerberg will knock you out and send you straight to-''

''I Am Damaged''

-''I am damaged, far too damaged, but you're not beyond repair.''

-''Please stand back now. Little further.''

-Veronica's trying to reason with him, tearfully.

-Oh, wow, this song is so emotional, too.

-''Say hi to God.''

-''You look like hell.''

-''I just got back.''

''Seventeen [Reprise]''

-''Listen up, folks, war is over. Brand new sheriff's come to town.''

-''We're all freaks, but it's alright.''

-Aw, Veronica, you go, girl. Make things right.

-''Are there any happy endings?''

-This song is the perfect combination of sadness and hopefulness. 

-I'm so close to tears. But in a good way.

-Such a great song, just, wow.

-''We can be seventeen.''

-''One day we'll change the world.''

-Okay, it's official, I'm making this everybody's official high school graduation song. Don't even try and stop me.

-''Act like we're all still kids 'cause this could be our final chance.''

-Yes, yes, I love this song so much. 

-''We'll make it beautiful.''

So, basically, this musical is an emotional roller coaster, but it's SO GOOD, oh my gosh. I mean, it'd have to be, since it's my second favorite musical of all time. This was my first time listening to a few of these. Gosh, I love this musical, and I would highly recommend it. I hope you enjoyed my random thoughts. 

So, have you listened to the musical? Did you like it?